New babies are magnificent. No matter what the circumstances within which they arrive, they are an experience like no other. They are also noisy, messy, demanding, and ungrateful. Babies initially demand a degree of self-sacrifice that may be new to young parents. So amidst the joy and excitement of a new baby, it’s normal for new parents to also feel resentful and hemmed in. For young people for whom being up at 2 a.m. has generally meant there’s a party going on – being up at 2 a.m. walking a crying baby is a huge adjustment. It is important to recognize that all life adjustments take time, effort, and the relinquishment of another way of being. It can be helpful for new parents to acknowledge this and to affirm their feelings of regret or resentment without adding guilt to the mix. Having a new baby also means that parents have less time for each other. Couple time must become not only more intentional but more spontaneous – another significant adjustment. Parenting is possibly the most significant role we may assume for which there is little or no training or preparation. “It takes a village to raise a child” is not a catch phrase, but a concept with real significance.
Your wise words offer an important experiencial map. Parents who are open to expressing their excitement and their fear before birth are richly rewarded afterwords. it does take a village.
This is very true! Your blogs are so helpful!! I think all new parents need to read this! 🙂
As a couple expecting their 1st child, this post definitely resonates. We go back-and-forth between excitement and worry about whether or not we will be able to handle the responsibility and sacrifice. I guess we just need to allow ourselves the time to adjust. Thanks!
This is helpful, many thanks, Adriana